Don't Talk About the Mistakes of Others
Mistakes such as being rude, incompetent, not telling the truth, threatening, cheating, belligerent, stealing, harming, killing, boasting, arrogance, scared, aggressive....and the list goes on.
The Outbreak of 幸灾乐祸, Xing Zai Le Huo
Gloating Over the Mistakes & Misfortune of Others
The water of the valley stream is always flowing. It races on, not pausing for an instant. The water of time glistens on the riverbed of the universe. Though theirs is a much slower flow, stones, trees, houses and towns are flowing too. Human beings and all things that have life flow. And culture, too, flow. That all these appear to be unchanging is but illusion.
If we but see things as they are and flow with them, we may find enjoyment in transience.
It may seem curious even off the mark to begin an essay on the shameful feeling of gloating over another’s misfortune with a quote that so beautifully captures our earthly nature. But somehow it seems exact and precise to begin with this poetic reminder of things not lasting.
The fortune or misfortune of others is included in this illusion, yet we often get our hopes-up that something will slip through the cracks and remain the same. We especially want others who we deem unworthy to stay down and out and ourselves to stay safe and secure. It happens at work, between siblings and in spiritual communities.
No community or relationship escapes the possibility of an outbreak of what the Chinese call Xing Zai Le Huo and the Germans call schadenfreude. It’s the feeling that arises when we gloat over the misfortune of others.
If we look closely at ourselves, we are likely to find it especially the case if we rely on our ego-self as our guru in life. We don’t like change, but if it must be so, we want to control it according to our self-centered view of the world. If we are unable to see the illusion of change at work, we are likely to miss the enjoyment that comes when we are aware of transience.
Everything lasts for a short time and quickly comes to an end and yet we can get quite irate about the slightest thing when our ego-self feels slighted.
Often, we wait in ambush to gloat over the inevitable change of fortune for the one who may have been the offender. When we feel triumph over another’s fall, we lose out on something far more useful to the spiritual aspirant. We lose out on joy.
This wish for something to last underlies the appalling human trait to be gleeful when another falls. Our delight in the misfortune of others is quite common and widespread.
The entertainment industry is replete with film and television shows that parlay this amusement of misfortune into billions of dollars. The sports industry readily promotes “beating” the other guy and big business spends countless dollars on media to crush the competition. And of course, there are numerous videos on Youtube® that often land unsolicited in our e-mail basket depicting others falling on ice, sliding off the road in winter and getting soaked in a rainstorm.
It’s conceivable we are laughing at the misfortunes of others as an attempt, albeit a poor one, to manage the certainty of things not lasting. Until we awaken with Buddha eyes we attempt to deal with change and in this case the inevitable bad luck and hardship of this earthly realm with a pitiable and haughty sense of ego.
We must remember everyone suffers.
Don’t give up. Keep going.
OM
🙏
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