Only Half In
A Flirtation with Spiritual Reality - A Vampire in Disguise
There was a woman. She was in distress. Lonely. Unhappy. And very, very angry. She was skilled at pretending and acting as though she was committed. For some time she fooled those around her with her playful pretense of being engaged. Because she often presented herself as hurt and needy others wanted to help her. Her charm mesmerized others into thinking she was engaged in the work of spiritual awakening. It took some time, but she eventually confessed that she never was really engaged…she just wanted to have a bit of fun with a group of people.
Very much like a corpse she came to life around others long enough to drink up what she needed from the spiritual others. She was very clever in her pretense.
The result was hard to watch. For a very long time she continued to cause trouble by an attitude of arrogance and superiority. It took time for others to notice - but thankfully her disguise became transparent.
She was giddy, silly and unreliable. Only half in, giving lip service to herself.
What Happened?
She was like a clay pot with holes in it. She did not follow the teachings because she could not hold them. Everything leaked out. She did not pay attention and laughed or whimpered when directed to stop the leaks. There was so much discontent that she began to be feeble.
If you find yourself half in, here is what you need to do on your path of suffering.
This is just the beginning…
Take heed that this life, your life is about YOU. This means you study your self and avoid the entanglements and suffering of others. Study yourself to forget the self.
The mind is the forerunner of all things. All your experience is preceded by mind and the senses. Study the mind without acting on what shows up. Stay still.
To carry yourself forward to experience things & others is the source of your suffering. It is the root of ignorance to do so. It is like a bolt between your life and transcendence. It blocks transcendence and keeps you on the Path of Suffering. Round and round you go on the selfish merry-go-round.
You can wish all you want for this to be otherwise, but don’t waste your time with that wish - study the bolt of your self-centeredness in such a way to remove the bolt of selfishness. The key here is to seek nothing for yourself. Empty the self. No claim.
We will go over some specifics in the next part of The Path of Suffering.
In the meantime, study and watch the mental formations that come up in the mind. Just watch. Stay still. Don’t go after them.
www.asinglethread.net - www.zatma.org
The Fundamental Point - Beginning of Novel